Alternate Universe Bush News


Welcome to this week's wrap-up.

In AU#12, George W. Bush rises seven more points from last month's record popularity of 72%. Analysts surmise that most of those gains were because of the recently released figures showing Bush's anti-corruption campaign leading to over 1 million fewer illegal aliens in the U.S. than this year at the same time.

Meanwhile, over in AU#43, president Bush continues his long "fishing vacation" on his ranch, Pro Tem President Cheney's popularity rating recovered slightly from last week, and is now at 11%.

Slightly cheerier news from AU#71. In that universe, it's been over a year since the country of Honduras accepted our offer and decided to take the entire Bush administration, Bush family, and large numbers of BushBots off our hands. "Caudillo Jorge" is well on his way to "privatising" what little of Honduras' industries remain after the short-lived "Bush War". In the west, Subcomandante Jeb has managed to rally several indigenous tribes to his cause. "El Jefe Hewitt" reports that "Caudillo Jorge" plans to increase banana production 43% this quarter, and the future is looking brighter every day.

The 2008 presidential races are heating up in AU#38. Vicente Fox is still considered a long shot for the U.S. race, despite heavy backing by the GOP. And, in Mexico, George W. Bush is likewise considered a long shot despite being fully backed by the PAN party. This is believed to be the first time in history that termed-out presidents have switched countries, although many speculate that in Bush's case he switched many years ago.

And, over in AU#15, George W. Bush has been appointed Assistant Manager of the Garland (TX) Four Day Tire Store.